Wednesday, 12 January 2011
#4 Family -- My Granny ♥♥♥
So as a great family lover it took me less than a minute to decide to write a blog post about the most special woman in my life -- my Granny :).
Since I was a little girl I feel like she has always been there for me, as I grew up in her house for three years of my life because my mam was young so still lived at home, I've always felt like it has been a home away from home for me, I always remember going there straight after school and she would always make our tea, her home made crinkle cut chips with something, and I used to spend a lot of time with her and my Grandad until he died when I was aged 6...he will come as a seperate post :). I used to look forward to seeing her, I saw her each and every day and although its less now it's still at least 3 times a week, she is one of those people who fill my heart with love and I can always guarantee a cuddle from her. She is without a doubt one of the most strong, caring, loyal people I have ever known and I know she'll always be there for me even when she can't be anymore... She's a big believer in god, and if I have job interviews or anything else she always says she'll "pray to st.jude for me", she's always been proud of whatever I have done and given any encouragement I needed, still to this day she encourages me to what I want with my life. She told me the day I found out my Dad wasn't my biological dad that I will always be part of her family and she will always love me no matter what :).
It comes with great sadness to me and its something I haven't quite got round to dealing with yet that ever since she had a heart attack on Christmas Day, the day after my 18th birthday she hasn't quite been the same, now about 5 years on we found out last year she has a form of both Dementia and Alzheimer's Disease, we thought it was just old age as you go on forgetting stuff etc. It broke my heart to hear that she had these, and yet she still remains strong, it breaks my heart even more to see how she goes downhill a lot, and its more taking one step forward and three steps back at the minute, she's lonely and withdrawn, eventhough we go and see her every day she doesn't remember and feels like we've forgotten about her. We dropped her at Tesco on the way to work today and I was upset at how lost she looked and how she just wandered in in a world of her own and wandered around aimlessly. She loses things and forgets and then gets angry with herself and that just makes things worse :(.
I'm trying to be strong for her, but deep down I can't deal with the fact she is "losing it" and one day she won't even remember who we are. But I'll always be there for her.
She's my heart, my soul and my universe, and I am so grateful to have someone like her in my life!
Posted by Natalie at 17:16